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Wrestling Today's Date:

Falls Count Anywhere


Oh, the poor fool...
Welcome to Falls Count Anywhere! My name is Chris and I’m a Happy Boy


The show, which came through crystal clear, paid-for and legal cable provided by ComCast, started with a recap of the Dominic situation from last week and then went right into Eddie Guerrero coming out and saying that he was going to win the Ladder Match and bring Dominic home for all the fathers out there. Good heat on this one, though they probably piped in some of the "Eddie Sucks" chants. Eddie is really good on the stick and I wish they’d put him in the hunt again.

Mercury and Melina beat Booker T and Sharmell in a match that I wasn’t quite interested in. Yeah, Melina is hot and does have a certain amount of working ability, but Sharmell is no good. Melina couldn’t do much with Sharmell, so she tagged Mercury who went after Sharmell but got a face full of Eye Rake instead. Booker came in and got caught in a headlock. Booker made his comeback and fought with the Scissors Kick and the Spinerooni before forcing Mercury to tag Melina. Sharmell came in and Melina got the advantage with a couple of chokes. Mercury came in, but Booker took him. Jillian Hall tripped Sharmell and Melina got a pin with her feet on the ropes. After the commercial, Sharmell said that Booker dropped the ball by letting her get pinned.

Heidenreich got his spikes and is now Hawk 2.0. That he’s an even worse worker than Hawk was is what’s really funny.

Chris Benoit was backstage when Orlando Jordan came up and started giving him grief. Nothing new was said except that Orlando promised to knock out Benoit and Chris said he’d make Jordan tap out. Benoit is going nowhere right now. They need to make him US Champion or at least give him a series of convincing wins over top opponents. He should be a majour champion right now. He’d probably be able to carry Batista to a series of good or better matches. GIVE HIM THE BALL!

Fee Fi Fo Fum, this angle is really dumb...
Animal and Heidenreich did their squash of two more jobbers. Just get the belts off of them and get them back to MNM so that they can rebuild after all this tire spinning.

Funaki, SmackDown!'s number one reporter, interviewed JBL. JBL talked about being a wrestling God and then challenged Funaki to the No Holds Barred match for later in the night. The match was a squash with Funaki getting almost nothing. Funaki got a shot to the head with a chair when Batista came out to an explosive reaction. He gave JBL the Spinebuster, but JBL ran off before anything else.

Rey Mysterio did the fly-up entry, but he looked pensive as he made his way to the ring. Simon Dean came out and said that he was offering Rey a Family Discount on the Simon System, though Rey’s family was shrinking. Rey took it to him for that gag. This was a little back and forth, but it was mostly Rey. Rey hit a nice pull-down arm drag that set Simon up for the 619. Rey then dropped the dime and got the win.

Christian was in the ring for The Peep Show. He got an awesome response. They were in T-Dot, so this should have been expected. He said that the only person worthy of him interviewing was himself. The Mexicools came out and started ripping apart the Peep Show set, including popping Christian’s way-cool blow-up chair. Someone backstage was really mad that they had blown it up and now they just popped it. Christian went to fight them off, but the Mexicools had numbers and they beat him down, with SuperCrazy giving him a Moonsault at the same time Psicosis gave him a sloppy leg drop. Juvy then dropped a Flying Elbow. This wasn’t a smart idea, but it probably gives Christian something to do.

Orton’s first important match since he came back was against Chris Benoit. They did the entrances and then when they came back from commercial, the match was started. They worked really well together, especially at the start when they were doing back and forth and a lot of ground work. Benoit got a bit of an advantage, and even went for the Sharpshooter three times before Orton bailed out and we went to break.

We came back as Orton went for a Dropkick, but Benoit held the ropes and then put on the Sharpshooter. Great reaction for that. Benoit was getting a lot of love from the Toronto crowd. Benoit got one of those great DDTs that Orton does with the other guy’s feet on the ropes. Orton went for the RKO, but Benoit turned it into Triple Germans and a Diving Headbutt. Orlando Jordan ran in at that point, but Benoit knocked him off the apron. That allowed Orton to get the RKO and the pin. Of course, the lights went out and Undertaker appeared in the ring and gave Orton a Chokeslam.

A show that was uneven, with good stuff like the Orton match and weak stuff like the Mixed tag. I’d say that this show did OK leading into SummerSlam, but not enough.

Not a lot. Steph McMahon has finally succeeded in squashing the hopes of ECW fans. She was never a fan of even doing the PPV (which has done 300K+, but how plus the WWE hasn’t released) and there are plans for one next year, but nothing long-term.

There’s lot of talk that Chris Jericho is going to be leaving the WWE. I’ve had it confirmed a few different places that this is not the case and that he’ll be back as soon as creative has something for him to do.

Supposedly, Vince and others were trying to get a hold of Bret Hart before the RAW angle to explain. They didn’t seem to have managed to do it. Bret won’t be at SummerSlam, and there are no plans for any sort of angle with Bret on TV. He doesn’t want the WWE to make any money off of the Montreal angle and he certainly doesn’t want to work with Michaels at all, and he can’t even wrestle, so he won’t be there. It’s also looking unlikely that he’ll let himself be enshrined in the Hall of Fame. He’s currently finishing up work on the Bret Hart DVD.

TNA PPV Report
I got a mangled TNA PPV tape and watched it. My regular source’s cable box was being fritzy, which may mean SummerSlam is going to have to come from somewhere else. Some of it was in B+W and other parts were just image with no audio. Still, it was a really strong PPV and I doubt that SummerSlam will top it.

I had no sound for the opening, which was Chris Sabin, Sonjay Dutt and Shark Boy against “Primetime” Elix Skipper, Simon Diamond and David Young. It was a good match, though not the best on the show. Shark Boy and Sonjay are two of my favourites in TNA right now, and here they were both good. Shark Boy opened with chops and a neckbreaker before taking a chomp out of David Young’s behind. That’s a funny spot that would go over big in Mexico. After Skipper cheated his way in, they had Shark Boy do some Face in Peril stuff until he managed to tag Dutt. Sonjay didn’t get much offense, so he tagged in Sabin who got a near fall off of a Springboard Dropkick. Lots of fast moves, like the Trapeze Headscissors and a beautiful Spinebster. The tv started getting really wonky at this point and it looked like Sabin and Skipper were doing the near fall series the WWE made popular in the 1999-2001 time frame. I think it was Sabin who got the pin, but it was hard to tell.

Alex Shelley, who has a spread in PWI this month, beat Shocker in a finish that…well, shocked me. You see, TNA had been putting all of their Hispanic eggs in Shocker’s basket, but they had him job to a guy who’s not exactly at the top of the card. Don’t get me wrong, these two have had good matches, but this was being billed as the final of a Best of Three, so they should have given the win to the guy who is supposed to draw Mexican eyes, but no. Still, I like Shelley a lot.

He's got something in a cradle...
They did a lot of great mat work to open. Shelley worked on Shocker’s leg, which is when the sound finally came in on the tape. They did a good job of selling the offense and story of the match through the commentary. Shocker hit a Tilt-A-Whirl Backbreaker and Shelley went outside, allowing Shocker to hit a nice Plancha. Shocker started working all sorts of submissions, but Shelley made the ropes and gave Shocker a Tornado DDT. Shocker kept breaking holds after Shelley wouldn’t submit. Shelley got a cradle and a hand on the ropes for the pin. Fun match.

Abyss beat Lance Hoyt. Much of this was badly shakey on the tape, but the commentary seemed to give away that Hoyt was often distracted by Father Jim Mitchell and Hoyt hit a dive over the top to the floor. Hoyt hit the Van Terminator for a near fall, but a couple of Black Hole Slams closed the book on this match. I kinda wish I could have seen it clearly because it sounded action-packed.

I got the first couple of minutes of Monty Brown and Kip James taking on Konnan and Ron Killings. It went out after the guys went to the floor and came back right as The Fallen Angel Christopher Daniels came to the ring for his match with Austin Aries.

The Fallen Angel should get more than a few votes for Wrestler of the Year this year. He’s been an amazing champion for much of the year. Aries and Daniels did some mat which was pretty top-notch. Aries used a great Springboard Elbow that looked like it hurt. They went out and came back in as the sound went out. Aries hit a Twisting Crossbody before Daniels started working the neck. Good call as he made the various rest holds he busted into heat drawing sequences as the sound came back on. Aries twisted out of a Suplex and hit a Standign Shooting Star Press for a near-fall. Aries also hit a 450, but Daniels made the ropes. Aries got a few more near falls, but Daniels hit the Angel’s Wings for the pin. Good match and these two are great. I really wanna see more from these two together.

The picture got even better for a match that I was very excited about. Jerry Lynn, fresh off his surgery on his shoulder, took on Sean Syxx-Pac Waltman. These two used to wrestle each other in Global back in the early 1990s and I think they tangled in WCW when Waltman was Syxx and Lynn was Mr. JL. I’m not 100% on that, but I think so. A test of strength led Waltman to the advantage with chops a-plenty. A great head-scissor counter by Waltman where he sent Lynn into the post. Waltman worked over the shoulder, which was a great way to do it. Both of these guys were getting really good reactions. Jerry blocked a Suplex back into the ring by Suplexing Waltman to the floor! Great stuff was going on all over the place. They did the Hart Pin, where Waltman went for the Victory Roll, but Lynn sat down and got the pin. They shook hands and basked in the glory of the fans until Shawn gave Lynn an Armbreaker and then followed it up by working his arm over in the crowd until Shark Boy, Sonjay and others made the save. This was a great match and I can’t wait to see this feud again.

Team Canada beat The Naturals and America’s Most Wanted. That’s right, The Naturals and America’s Most Wanted, who had been feuded for a good long time in one of the better feuds of recent times, teamed to take on those dastardly Canadians. This was basically a match to get America’s Most Wanted even more over by having them basically carry this full match against Team Canada. Storm hit a nice Spinning Slam on Petey Williams and that was followed by Roode running in and chop-clocking him. The led to Chase Stevens of the Naturals carrying things for a while. Lot’s of good stuff here, including the Natural Disaster on Roode (I think) and a big ole brawl on the outside. On the inside, Stevens ran into Storm by accident and that let Roode get the roll-up and a handful of tights to get the win for Team Canada. This will only add fuel to the Naturals vs. AMW feud.

Wanna talk about great matches? Samoa Joe and AJ Styles had a hell of a match. They worked spots like Joe blocking a discus punch before flat kicking Styles hard. AJ tried to take Joe down, but he was over-powered. Styles went for a Thesz press, but Joe smartly turned it into a Spinebuster. These guys were just so physical, especially with Joe just kicking the hell out of Styles. Big jumping kick by Styles led him to try the Styles Clash, but Joe blocked it. Joe used lots of submissions that I enjoyed. Styles blocked a Muscle Buster and managed a Torture Rack. Chris Daniels came to the ring and hit Styles with the belt. Styles knocked Daniels out of the ring, but Joe got the Muscle Buster and then the Kokina Choke to win the X Tourney. Great stuff and the crowd gave it a Standing O.

Well, Jeff Jarrett and Rhino beat Sabu and Raven in a match that was better than I expected. Lots of objects, including a pizza cutter used on a forehead. This was a basic brawl with sections of Sabu going for a table and hitting spots in-between. Nice spot where Rhino went for a Suplex but Sabu turned it into a Neckbreaker. Interference happened with Abyss and Jeff Hardy interfering. Slingshot leg lariat by Sabu! The picture started to cut out, but I believe that Rhino set up a table in the corner and gored Raven through it for the pin which means that he gets the next title shot.

All in all, a really good PPV, just a few notches down from the ECW PPV due to the heat and emotion that show carried.

That’s all for this week. More when the work week starts to drag you down!

Talk about today's column in the forums!

Chris Garcia

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