to Falls Count Anywhere! My name is Chris and Chase Masterson
sat on my lap.
was for a team-building exercise. I swear it.
We open with Carlito out with Matt Morgan. They show the
F5 that Morgan gave to Big Show and it’s even more
impressive than when we first saw it. He talks on and on
about being able to beat Big Show and Teddy Long comes and
makes fun of Morgan. He then announces a Winner’s
Choice Battle Royale, with the winner getting their choice
of matches with whoever they want. Carlito says that he’ll
use his win to get another match with Big Show.
took on Holly and Hass again. As with the last few, this
was a good match and Haas was looking good. These guys are
great together. Haas and Holly even have a little heat now,
impressive for a team comprised of guys who have been left
behind. Haas hit an awesome Overhead Belly to Belly which
allowed him to make the hot tag to Holly. Melina slapped
Haas. The finish was a DQ after Holly hit the Alabama Slam
and our man Nitro came in and hit him with a chair for the
DQ. Good stuff.
Cena came out and did a promo. The folks were way into him.
They showed a recap of the match from the PPV and it looked
really good even in photo form. JBL limped out and they
chatted like enemies for a while leading to Cena telling
JBL he had made a tribute video for him. JBL started playing
nice and Cena showed a video of JBL repeatedly saying ‘I
Quit’. This was a riff on an angle done by Bill Watts
back in the day with Michael Hayes, but that was better
vs. Big Show was lame. Basically, Big Show beat on Carlito
and Matt Morgan got involved. Matt was thrown out and Big
Show hit a big Chokeslam for the win. Morgan returned and
gave Big Show an F5 onto a Table which was even more impressive
than the one in the ring at the PPV. They are really missing
the boat on Carlito by not making him a serious heel competitor.
Angle comes out and does a promo about losing at Judgment
Day (which he didn’t like) and Vince McMahon bringing
back ECW (which he didn’t like either). He talked
a little about the crucifixion angle the night he was at
the ECW show in 1996. I was at the show before that one
at the ECW Arena.
good gravity goes bad...
interesting recall to a match from 1999, Angle mouthed off
towards Tazz and Tazz thought that he might come over and
do something about it. I’ve been saying that Tazz
should come back for one last run, and a match with Angle
at the ECW PPV would be nice. Angle then took on some guy
named Robert and beat him with the Ankle Lock in fifteen
seconds to win the Angle Challenge.
Battle Royale starts with Angle saying that he wants it
to start right away. Rey Mysterio comes out and is attacked
with a chair by Eddie Guerrero before he even hits the ring.
They are really pushing that feud more than any other lately
and I’m glad to see it. Eddie stays outside the ring
for a while because he knows everyone wants to take him
out. This is a Larry Zybysko classic concept. Matt Morgan
saves Carlito from getting tossed by Nunzio and Shannon
Moore. There’s a lot of great action, including Eddie
getting tossed by Rey and Rey then attacking him after.
down to Angle and Rey, which was the same final two from
the Battle Royale that was on the SmackDown! following WrestleMania
XX. This segment was really good, as these two work well
together, with all sorts of teased eliminations and suplexes.
Angle low blows Rey when he came off with a Springboard,
which allowed Kurt to get the AngleSlam and win the match.
He then said that he wanted Sharmell in a match for next
week. Wow, that’s not good.
show, better than most lately.
Jerry...you know what they say about a bird in the
The show opened with a Swimsuit competition. Jerry Lawler
brings out Christy Hemme, Candace Michelle, Maria, Victoria
and Lillian Garcia. They are all concealing bathing suits
under towels. Right after Lillian is announced, Big Viscera
comes out and carries Lillian away, leaving the four others.
This turned out to be the greatest segment in the recent
history of RAW. After they all showed off the goods, Christy
was announced as the winner but then Victoria attacked,
giving Maria a high kick, nailing Candace in the face, and
giving Christy the Widow’s Peak. This was awesome
and the crowd seemed to appreciate it. Well, if they are
trying to revive the women’s division, this is a good
start, especially if they can get Trish back in the ring
some time soon.
HeartThrobs, who are never going to get over unless they
are allowed to do their entire gimmick and are given wins,
took on Hurricane and Rosie. MNM is the next big Tag Team,
but The HeartThrobs are actually better gimmick-wise. Hurricane
and Rose took the match even though The Throbs worked Hurricane
over for much of the match. They used the Shoulder-Stand
Splash off of Rosie for the pin.
Bischoff did a segment with Batista where Batista announced
that he accepted HHH’s challenge. This didn’t
get the reaction they would have liked. Muhammad Hassan
challenged Batista, who accepted.
was a pretty good three-way match between Sylvan Grenier,
Rob Conway and Shelton Benjamin. La Rez worked together
at first, hitting the Hart Attack on Shelton, but when Conway
went for the pin, Grenier pulled him off. The match went
with a fast series of trades and the like and ended with
Shelton kicking Grenier into Conway and then hitting the
T-Bone for the win. Nice little match.
Jericho came out for the Highlight Reel. He heeled it up,
saying that he was so busy and almost didn’t make
it because he was at an autograph signing and a guy on his
level couldn’t be counted on to make all his appearances.
He brought out Kane and Chris started mocking him saying
that he was impotent and that was why Kane got dumped.
showed up on the TitanTron and talked about spearing Kane
and spearing Lita. I’m fairly certain he was using
different forms of the word “spear” in this
one. The crowd gave a lot of ‘You Screwed Matt’
chants. Edge is a solid heel and the pairing was really
Kane -- why don't you try Levitra?
and Edge met in a Tables match. Back in the day, I can remember
reading a post by net-reviewer and pioneer Christopher R.
Zimmermann saying that “Sure, they might use chairs
and tables, but we’re a long way from seeing Double
Tables on Raw.” True, the business has changed a lot
in the last decade, but still, this didn’t seem like
anything overly special. This was too short, but it was
entertaining. I like table matches, since they are so simple.
point, Benoit was about to Superplex Edge through a table
set-up in the ring, but Lita pulled the table out of the
way. Eventually, Bischoff sent out Maven, Tyson Tomko and
the returning Gene Snitsky to put Benoit through the table.
sucks. That’s all there is to it. He’s got an
ego that allows him to take up so much time on RAW with
an interview that showed great intensity, but went on way
too long. He really needs to pull himself out of the game
(pun slightly intended) and let them build a bit of heat
without him so that he can return and make a real impact.
Challenge time. Audience guy lost. He’s now going
to open it to wrestlers from the locker room. I wish they
would end this.
came out to a real superstar reaction from the Canadian
crowd and plugged that he would be jumping to SmackDown!.
They better send him over or else he’ll have no chance
of making it on RAW. As Jason Schachat said all weekend,
“You know, I’m having my problems with Canada
Hassan won a match over Batista via DQ. They gave Batista
a more impressive entrance, which helps him with an even
bigger reaction when he comes out for his matches. Hassan
actually had the advantage for a while, using a DDT and
a couple of kicks. Batista hit a Spinebuster and took over
on offense. Batista tossed Daivari off the top rope and
then gave him a series of knees that busted him up. He followed
that up with punches to Hassan in the corner and when he
wouldn’t stop, he was DQ’ed. He then destroyed
Hassan, and I mean destroyed him, with a chair and more
say that this was a strong episode, but still, they are
in a holding pattern until the Draft Lottery, which starts
all for today. More on Friday.
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